My 26 takeaways from Book “Hell yeah or No” by Derek Sivers about making things happen

The book I really wish I could have read earlier.

Photo by Brendan Church on Unsplash

I read “Anything You Want: 40 Lessons for a New Kind of Entrepreneur” by Derek Sivers early this year and love it so much. See below my reading notes:

Reading notes of “Anything You Want: 40 Lessons for a New Kind of Entrepreneur” by Derek Sivers

So I decided to read another book written by him.

“Hell yeah or No” is a short book about “thoughts around what’s worth doing, fixing faulty thinking, and making things happen”.

I like every line of this book and hope I could have read it earlier.

Book info:

ISBN: 9781988575070
Date read: 2021–02–24
How strongly I recommend it: 10/10

1. No matter what you tell the world or tell yourself, your actions reveal the truth and your real values.

• Saying something doesn’t make it true. Your actions show you what you actually want.
• So 1. Stop lying to yourself and admit your real priorities. 2. Start doing what you say you want to do, and see if it’s really true

2. Success comes from doing, not declaring.

• Don’t let the premature sense of satisfaction keep you from doing the hard work necessary.
• Stop fooling yourself. Be honest about what’s past and what’s present.
• Your actions are completely under your control and seem to be the best indicator of future success.

3. Whatever you decide, you need to optimize for that goal and be willing to let go of the others.

• You can’t diffuse your energy, trying to do a little bit of everything, or you’ll always be in conflict with yourself.
• Once you realize what you really want and admit it, you need to pursue it.
• But whatever you choose, brace yourself, because people are always going to tell you that you’re wrong. That’s why you need to know why you’re doing what you’re doing. Know it in advance. Use it as your compass and optimize your life around it.

4. You know the exiting business that you wish you had thought of? Copy it.

• Like a funhouse mirror that distorts what it reflects, your imitation will turn our much different from the original.
• Look around those existing ideas in the world. You can imitate them and still be offering something valuable and unique.

5. Old opinions shouldn’t define who we are in the future.

• Be careful when you say you like or dislike something because you could change your mind soon.
• We shouldn’t preserve our first opinions as if they reflect our pure, untarnished, true nature. They’re often just the result of inexperience or a temporary phase.

6. The public you is not you.

• A little online avatar that has the same name as me, but is not me. People’s reactions had nothing to do with the real me. It was like watching a little videogame character get attacked. It was funny to watch, part of the game, and not personal at all.
• Public comments are just feedback on something you made. They’re worth reading to see how this thing has been perceived.
• All people know is what you’ve chosen to show them. So if your public persona is coming across wrong, try tweaking it.

7. Present-focused and future-focused.

• You need a present-focus to enjoy life. But too much present-focus can prevent the deeper happiness of achievement.
• If I’m acting too undisciplined, I realized it’s because I’ve stopped vividly seeing my future. I can only see the present,
• If I’m acting too disconnected, I realize it’s because I’m obsessed with my goals, I can see only the future.

8. Start by taking one small action that will change your self-identity.

• You do just one thing that makes you feel like a leader, so you start to act like a leader, so you become a leader.
• The world treats you as you treat yourself. Your actions show the world who you really are.

9. If you’re not feeling “hell yeah!” then say no.

• Saying no makes your yes more powerful.
• It’s bad to say yes when you’re overwhelmed, over-committed, or need to focus.
• Refuse almost everything. Do almost nothing. But the things you do, do them all the way.
• Time really is limited. Time spent doing one thing is time spent not doing something else
• When you quit, you make room for change.

10. In the beginning, is when you know the least.

• Someone asks you a question. You don’t need to answer. You can say “I don’t know” and take your time to answer after thinking.
• When should you make decisions? When you have the most information.
• Resist the urge to figure it all out in advance.

11. Getting out of a bad state of mind:

• Ask myself what’s wrong in this every second: am I in physical pain or danger? No, I’ve got mental pain, but that’s just me imaging things or remembering things. None of it is real.
• Observe now. Act later: when I’m feeling cloudy, my decisions and actions will be cloudy too. So I wait a few days before acting on anything. I watch the emotions pass like a thunderstorm.
• Raise standards. Say no to anything less than great: When I am down, I avoid anyone who doesn't rejuvenate me. They’re not allowed in my life right now. No big explanation needed. No compromise. No favours. Empty time has the potential to be filled with great things.
• Focus on my goal: once you can clearly see where you’re heading, you’re less likely to let anything get in your way. It’s also important to separate the real goal from the old mental associations.
• Do all the necessary stuff: when everyday responsibilities are done, my mind is less distracted. Doing boring work moves me from a state of doing nothing to doing something. It makes me feel like doing something important again.

12. If you catch yourself burning with envy or resentment, think like the bronze medalist, not the silver.

• Instead of comparing up the next-higher situation, compare down to the next lower one.
• I’ve met a lot of famous musicians. The miserable ones were upset that they weren’t more famous because they’d bitterly compare themselves to the superstars. The happiest ones were thrilled to be able to make a living making music.
• Most of the time, you need to be more grateful for what you’ve got, for how much worse it could have been, and how nice it is to have anything at all.
• Watch Jerry Seinfeld’s “silver medal” routines.

13. Tedious steps or one fun step.

• If we hate doing something, we think of it as hard. We picture it as having many annoying steps.
• If we love doing something, it seems simple. We think of it as one fun step.

14. You have to remember that there are always more than two options.

• At the very least, add “do nothing” and “go insane” as options.
• People got stuck if they have only two options. They start comparing the pros and cons of those two and forget to think of more.
• Great insight comes only from opening your mind to many options. Brainstorm them all, from hybrids to the ridiculous.
• It takes under an hour, but has always helped people feel less stressed, think clearly, and get excited about the decision that used to feel like dilemmas.

15. Beware of advice.

• If everyone around him is quitting their jobs, his advice to you will be to keep your job. That advice has nothing to do with what’s best for you — it’s just the opinion that seems under-represented in his environment that day.
• Ultimately, only you know what to do, based on all the feedback you’ve received and all your personal nuances that no one else knows.

16. Focus on one thing at a time, knowing you can do the other stuff afterwards.

• Life is like any journey. You need to change directions a few times to get where you want to go.
• Are you trying to pursue many different directions at once? Think long term. Use the future. Do just one thing for a few years, then another for a few years, then another.
• You can fully focus on one direction at a time, without feeling conflicted or distracted, because you know you’ll get to the others.
• You just need foresight and patience.
• Most people overestimate what they can do in one year, and underestimate they can do in ten years.

17. I love being wrong:

• To assume you’re below average is to admit you’re still learning. You focus on what you need to improve, not your past accomplishments.
• Many people are so worried about looking good that they never do anything great.
• Whenever something has gone wrong in my life, I’ve asked myself “What’s great about this?”
• I actually love being wrong, even though it cracks my confidence because that's the only time I learn. I actually love being lost, even though it fuels fears, because that’s when I go somewhere unexpected.
• It’s better than thinking I’ve got it all figured out.

18. As soon I catch myself blaming anyone for anything, I decide it’s my fault and it felt so good.

• When someone upsets us, it’s human nature to feel it’s their fault. But one day I tried thinking of everything as my fault.
• This is way better than forgiving. When you forgive, you’re still assuming that they’re wrong and you’re the victim.
• People were just playing their part in the situation you helped create.
• Now you’re the person who made things happen, made a mistake, and can learn from it. Now you’re in control and there’s nothing to complain about.
• Think of every bad thing that happened to you, and imagine that you happened to it.

19. Happy, Smart and Useful are three things to consider when making life-size decisions.

• What makes you happy; What’s smart — meaning long-term good for you; What’s useful to others.
• we have a tendency to forget one of these. e.g. Smart and useful is rational, like a machine, but happiness is the oil. Without it, the friction kills the engine.

20. Balance (one of my favourite chapter):

• I prescribe the lifestyle of the happiest people I know: Having a well-paying job. While seriously pursue their art for love, not money. They have this balance.
• We all have a need for stability and adventure, certainty and uncertainty, money and expression.
• So something for love and something for money. Don’t try to make one thing to satisfy your entire life. Each half of your life becomes a remedy for the other.
• About the job: be smart, and choose something that pays well with a solid future. About your art: Pursue it seriously. Take lessons, make weekly progress, keep improving. If you don’t progress and challenge yourself creatively, it won’t satisfy the balance.
• Your main obstacle to this amazing life will be self-control. You’ll need good time management to stop addictions like social media, video watching and make your art your main relaxing activity. You’ll need good mind management to not think of your job after you leave the office.
• Most full-time artists I know only spend an hour or two a day actually doing their art. The rest is spent on the boring work that comes with trying to make it a full-time career. So skip the art career and just do the art.
• Don’t expect your job to fulfil all your emotional needs. Don’t taint something you love with the need to make money from it. Don’t try to make your job your whole life. Don’t try to make your art your sole income. Let each be what it is, and put in the extra effort to balance the two, for a great life.

21. Learning without doing is wasted.

• If I don’t turn what I learn into action, then it was pointless.
• Apply what you learn to your own life in your own way.

22. Smart people don’t think others are stupid:

• Being smart means thinking things through. It means trying to find the real answer, not the easiest answer.
• Being stupid means avoiding thinking by jumping to conclusions. It’s like quitting a game, you lose by default.

23. Moving to new places keeps you in a learning mindset.

• You’ll realize that your beliefs were not correct, they were just the local culture of there you grew up.
• If you want to keep your brain actively learning and growing forever, keep moving across the world.

24. Goals shape the present, not the future.

• The purpose of goals is not to improve the future. The future doesn’t exist. It’s only in our imagination. All that exists is the present moment and what you do in it.
• Judge a goal by how well it changes your actions in the present moment.
• A bad goal makes you say, “I want to do that someday.” A great goal makes you take action immediately.
• A bad goal is foggy, vague, and distant. A great goal is so clear, specific, and close you can almost touch it. (This is crucial to keep you going.)
• A bad goal makes you say, “I’m not sure how to start.” With a great goal, you know exactly what needs to be done next.
• A bad goal makes you say, “Let me sleep on it.” A great goal makes you say, “I can’t sleep! I was up until 2 a.m. doing this, then got up at 7 a.m. to do it some more.”
• But unless it changes your actions, right now, it’s not a great goal. Find another variation that excites you.

25. Inspiration is not receiving information. Inspiration is applying what you’ve received.

• Nothing is truly inspiring unless you apply it to your work. (“work” meaning your life’s output, whether creative, business, or personal).
• In other words, your work, itself, is the inspiration.
• You may hear something or see something that gives you a new idea. But it’s only when you stop and think of your work through this new perspective, that you actually jump up and go turn the idea into reality. That’s the real inspiration that everyone is looking for.
• Constantly seeking inspiration is anti-inspiring. You have to pause the input and focus on your output. Don’t forget to breathe out after breathing in.
• For every bit of inspiration, you take in, use it and amplify it by applying it to your work. Then you’ll finally feel the inspiration you’ve been looking for.
• Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe in. Breathe out.

26. Whatever scares you, go do it.

• Fear is just a form of excitement, and you know you should do what excites you.
• Best of all, once you do something that scared you, you’re not scared of it anymore! As you go through life, doing everything that scares you, you fear less and less in the world.
• “Life is an ongoing process of choosing between safety (out of fear and need for defence) and risk (for the sake of progress and growth). Make the growth choice a dozen times a day.”

Others:

• The excitement was in finding them, not keeping them. I hope I live my life like this (finding shells on the beach).
• When you notice that something is affecting your drive, find a way to adjust your environment, even if that’s a little inconvenient for others.
• Before you start something, think of the way it could end.

Reference:

[1] “Hell Yeah or No -what’s worth doing” (Derek Sivers)